Feel your feelings, don’t suppress them, don’t fear them. Feelings are an integral part of us and we should bring them to light, feel them, and accept them. When we connect with our feelings and allow ourselves to express them, we connect with ourselves and our authentic being. When we integrate feelings and recognize them, we should allow ourselves to feel them without feelings of shame or guilt. The more we feel and recognize our feelings, the less they will control us, and we will make more rational and correct decisions.
The worst thing we can do is suppress our feelings, ignore them because even if suppressed, feelings won’t disappear. They will be within us and will only grow, becoming an invisible force that controls us. Within each of us lies a two-year-old child who occasionally throws tantrums. Allow that child to express and release them; don’t smother those emotions.
A few days ago, my friend recounted an event that forced her to see herself as a two-year-old girl. She went to visit her mother and had been thinking for some time about transferring photos from her travels that remained on the phone she had given her mother. The condition she set was not to delete the photos. The phone had been with her mother for years, and she had only now decided to transfer the photos to her laptop. When she asked her mother for the phone to transfer her photos, she was told that her brother had deleted all the photos two years ago because there wasn’t enough memory on the phone, and none of her travel photos were saved. The realization that her photos were gone and that no one had informed her caused anger and pain, so she began to sob loudly. She cried for hours; at that moment, her pain was immense, everything stopped, she was only aware of her loss. Her mother sat beside her and let her cry, letting her to ask her a million times why she had done that and how she could have done it to her. At that moment, the world stood still for my friend; she mourned her loss, her mother recognized the child in her and let her mourn and show her feelings without shame or reservation.
When the scene she had with her mother calmed down, it was identical to the scenes she had with her three-year-old daughter. The day before, she peeled and halved a cucumber for her daughter. When she gave the plate with the cucumber to the little girl, she started crying loudly because she hadn’t asked for a halved cucumber, and no one had asked her if she wanted it that way. My friend’s reaction and that of her three-year-old daughter were identical. Both reacted strongly, and both showed their feelings without reservation or shame. My friend acted just like her mother, allowing the little girl to express her feelings without judgment or the desire to suppress them.
After both experienced the dramatic scene with crying, they forgot about the event that had shaken them so much; they expressed their feelings and thereby liberated themselves.
Feelings are there to be felt, accepted, and expressed. By feeling our feelings, we free ourselves. Feelings are there to serve us, and we should not be ashamed of them or suppress them.
Accept your feelings, don’t be afraid of them. Embrace every feeling within you, bring it to light, and then decide how to react to it.
